THANK YOU HEATHER for leading me towards the shining light of Brenda Dickson’s “vajeene” :)

First watch this from The Soup:

Then watch this!

If you aren’t watching Project Runway this season, then I don’t want to know you. It’s the only show I watch anymore and I just love it. And if that by itself doesn’t make me gay, then by posting this next video with Jack from season 4 definitely will.

He’s freaking hot! (P.S. There are nudies of him in the interweb tubes out there somewhere. A simple Google search should point you in the right direction)

This next post is for Michael in celebration of my finally locating and purchasing a holiday sweater :) And trust me, I only bought it because it goes along with an upcoming party theme. I do have taste, you know. At least I think so. Sometimes. In clothing. Mostly. Shut up.

“You’re gunna look better in your holiday sweater!” - as interpreted by the yips and snorting of these cute little pugs

This is a tribute to those of us that have enjoyed a Hotpocket in our lifetime. Let’s eat!

I heard about this on PNSexplosion and I was FINALLY inspired to post something new on my blog. Just follow the link on this image and enjoy the fragrance of a beautiful woman :)

(Source: www.smellmeand.com)

My friend Troy passed this on to me today and I just couldn’t help but post about it. Mainly because it completely reminded me of the first Des Moines Pride Parade I went to after only being exposed to Chicago’s Pride up until that point. Now I don’t want to sound like Des Moines has no “pride” because it certainly does. However, there’s a certain kind of small town, fish-out-of-water sorta thing going on. And I’m not taking about the lesbian vespa brigade representing Iowa’s proud Dykes on Bikes, which we affectionly coined “Cooters on Scooters.”

And since I’ve been meaning to get a new category going, considering my Smart Quotes category hasn’t exactly inspired me, this wonderful article from the Onion marks to beginning of the new category Smart News (even if this is fake news, I hope)

Small Town Holds Annual Gay Shame Parade

GRAND PLAINS, NE—A family deals with the anguish of realizing their son is a sinner in one of this year’s most popular floats.

And here are two photos from this year’s Pride Parades in Des Moines and Chicago that may help explain why this article made me chuckle so much. Check out my Flickr for many, many more!

Des Moines Pride 2007

Chicago Pride 2007

So I’m a dumbass. I thought I was being clever by ordering the new Harry Potter through Amazon so it would ship and be in my hands by the time I went on vacation. Well, for some reason, I thought it came out on a Wednesday and I was leaving on Friday. Of course it was too late to change the shipping address, or even cancel the order, by the time I realized it came out on a that Saturday. Sadly, I left for vacation to rural northern Minnesota knowing that my copy of Deathly Hollows would either be sitting on my door step waiting for someone to swipe it or hanging out in the post office.

Sidenote: The later happened, and by the time I went to pick it up at the post office, I only had 200 pages left. I’m getting ahead of myself here but what ev. Anyway, the bitch behind the counter was like “oh, I haven’t read it yet but I heard an interview this morning that said [ insert all major plot point spoilers here ]. God damn I was pissed. But being the sweet boy that I am, I just smiled and said “I guess I’ll see what happens tonight… (you fucking bitch hag troll from hell).”

Ok, back to the long ass story to explain the photos below. After we woke up on Saturday, I just HAD to get my hands on that book! So Carrie in all her sweetness drove me up somewhere north of Pine River, MN to a cute little book shop where I paid the full $35 for a second copy of a book that technically I owned already. And on our way back to the car, we past the pawn shop below and I just happened to read the sign posted on the door. Only in northern Minnesota :)

I just got back from watching Hairspray and if you haven’t seen it yet, DO IT NOW!  Not only is the music absolutely incredible, but Allison Janney plays Penny’s mom :)  Those of you “most smartest” will recognize her as Loretta from Drop Dead Gorgeous who uttered those beautiful words that gave this little blog its name.  So go watch this movie now!  Plus, you may just learn some new moves and end up being the “best goddamn tapper” in the whole trailer court!